Girlie Wisdom-for the ladies

chicky82 · 06-11-2008

Girlie Wisdom!

Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget where they left them.

A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills... she has 14 kids but doesn't really care.

One of life's mysteries is how a 2-pound box of chocolates can make a woman gain 5 lbs.

My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.

The best way to forget your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you are doing, someone else does.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.

Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

Sometimes I think I understand everything, and then I regain consciousness.

I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting fire to my undies.

Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks 2 sizes!

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like...'You know sometimes I forget to eat!' ......Now I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name and my keys, but I have never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him.

I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day!

Destiny · 06-12-2008

so true, so true!!! lol

truebluetara · 06-12-2008

LMAO!!! that is the funniest thing ive read in a very long time lol and I think ive had some of those thoughts a time or too myself!!! hehehe thanks this is an awesome post specially the one about forgetting to eat im the chubby one and my sis is the skinny one and somedays ide like to cram a few burgers down her throat LOL kidding kidding

ignite · 06-12-2008

that cheered me up

leia · 06-12-2008

Ha! Priceless. I wanted to quote something as my favorite line for today but I couldn't choose which one's the best!

daniellerae · 07-25-2008

I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting fire to my undies.

priceless!!

06-11-2008	#1
chicky82 Moderator Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Somewhere in the inner reaches of my insane mind Posts: 2,322 Threads: 66 Thanks: 199 Thanked 375 Times in 243 Posts	Girlie Wisdom-for the ladies Girlie Wisdom! Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget where they left them. A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills... she has 14 kids but doesn't really care. One of life's mysteries is how a 2-pound box of chocolates can make a woman gain 5 lbs. My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely. The best way to forget your troubles is to wear tight shoes. The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you are doing, someone else does. The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends. Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today. Sometimes I think I understand everything, and then I regain consciousness. I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting fire to my undies. Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks 2 sizes! Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like...'You know sometimes I forget to eat!' ......Now I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name and my keys, but I have never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat! The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him. I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day! __________________ http://jorats.com/forum/index.php I Pet Rats College!!!! Newbie Links. Please Read How to Thank (Please Use Thankyou Button)( important) Forum How to ( Everything you need to know) http://www.canadianfreestuff.com/for...freebies-4966/(How to spot fake freebies)

06-12-2008	#2
Destiny Moderator Join Date: May 2007 Disco Bowling Champion! Yeti Sports 1- Long Shot Version Champion! Clover Crunch Champion! 5 Spots Champion! FogHorn Thanks Champion! 12 Swap Champion! 625 Sandwich Stacker Champion! Tournaments Won: 9 Posts: 5,463 Threads: 2488 Thanks: 2,467 Thanked 4,815 Times in 1,816 Posts	so true, so true!!! lol __________________ Newbie Links How to Thank (Please Use Thankyou Button) (important) Forum How to (Everything you need to know)

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06-12-2008	#3
truebluetara Diva Beaver Join Date: May 2008 Location: vancouver island BC Posts: 342 Threads: 29 Thanks: 111 Thanked 170 Times in 85 Posts	LMAO!!! that is the funniest thing ive read in a very long time lol and I think ive had some of those thoughts a time or too myself!!! hehehe thanks this is an awesome post specially the one about forgetting to eat im the chubby one and my sis is the skinny one and somedays ide like to cram a few burgers down her throat LOL kidding kidding

06-12-2008	#4
ignite Bow Chicka Honk Honk! Join Date: Jun 2007 Cat Fling Champion! Location: Surrey, BC Posts: 704 Threads: 22 Thanks: 445 Thanked 80 Times in 70 Posts	that cheered me up

06-12-2008	#5
leia Little Beaver Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 21 Threads: 2 Thanks: 9 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts	Ha! Priceless. I wanted to quote something as my favorite line for today but I couldn't choose which one's the best!

07-25-2008	#6
daniellerae Bargain Diva Beaver Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 554 Threads: 158 Thanks: 3 Thanked 13 Times in 9 Posts	I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting fire to my undies. priceless!!